This post is to address the notion that Ebay is responsible only to shareholders and can abuse sellers at will.
Welcome to McEbay's
Effective immediately:
1)We will now serve all fries straight from the fryer into your hands. This will give our customers a fresher experience. In time our customers WILL adjust to having burnt hands.
2)We will not refrigerate our beef before making it into hamburgers. This will eliminate some customers, but the truly stong ones will survive. We will supply extra porta potties outside the restaurant to assist with the transition.
3)If you order a burger you HAVE to have fries with that. No discussion. Come back in three weeks for the fries.
4)Customers who complain about rule changes will be forcefully escorted off company property.
5)People who talk about customers who have been escorted off company property will be escorted off company property.
6)As we feel we are the only burger joint in town worth visiting we will ignore any customer complaints and then escort the complainer off of company property.
7)There will be no more napkins, if you get a red stain on you, it stays, permanently. Even if somebody who wasn't really a customer ran into the restaurant, smothered you in Ketchup and ran away again.
8)We are doubling our food prices for some of you and for others we are tripling our food prices. Who gets what increase will vary with what you order.
9)Our robots will be available to ignore your questions 24 hours a day seven days a week.
10)No noise in the restaurant!!
11) If we don't have what you ordered, we will give you whatever best matches your order. We decide what best matches your order.
12)You are our customers and you are happy with the changes...that's our story and we are sticking to it.
13)From time to time you may find some stuff in your unhappy meal, marked shoppers.com, that really isn't a McEbay's product, but will be counted as one anyway. You can't eat that stuff, it isn't real.
14)Good news, all meals can also be received in a Flat Rate Box provided by Canada Post. The boxes are $50.00 extra and measure 2 cm X 2 cm x 2 cm.
15)We will install a cardboard cutout of a customer service representive in Canadian Stores. We will it McEbay's Canada. It won't do anything, but it will be there. Comes in Rainer or Sanford.
