That's right, once you click to confirm your intention to buy, you cannot then delete it. You must ask the seller for a cancellation. If your seller is good and kind, she will send a Request for Cancellation to your ebay messages. The instant you click to respond and click to agree, you will no longer be responsible to pay for the item.
If, however, your seller is having a 'bad ebay day', she might not want to cancel. It is her choice. That means if you do not pay for the item you bought, she can open an Unpaid case against you and you either pay up or get a Strike. Most sellers block people with Strikes, - it's believed those with strikes are careless and indecisive.
Have a look at the following link about Unpaid Items. It is very important for a new ebayer to know this stuff (obviously you cannot know about something no one has told you):
http://pages.ebay.ca/help/buy/questions/unpaid-item.html
But I'm sure if you are very polite about it, the seller will cancel, -- if only because it's faster and easier than the alternative.
In future, use your Watch List to keep track of items whilst you decide. You simply click the phrase Add to Watch list below the 'Buy' button, and access the list from your Summary page.
Good luck. 🙂
