especially if the bidder is actually the seller I'm bidding against?
That is 'shill bidding' and is against both eBay policy and the law of the land.
If you are being outbid by a particular bidder constantly, it is unlikely that this is shilling, because a shiller does not want to win. He wants you to win at the highest price you are willing to pay.
Shillers usually will chase the high bid until they surpass it and then Retract their bid.
If this is happening, Report the auction to eBay Customer Support. They will not tell you the outcome of their investigation, perhaps because most of theses complaints are misunderstandings or mischievous..
Your best protection against shilling is to bid only once, bid your maximum, and bid late. Bidding late does not leave the shiller enough time to bid and retract.