I have to point something else out that I'm seeing a hint of, amero -
You're starting to sound like you believe that you're a helpless victim in all of this.
You're not, and the victim mentality, if it is really there, may preclude you from seeking solutions to these problems.
Paypal and ebay are not out to get you.
You're getting increased holdbacks from Paypal because you have a lot of chargebacks or you have a lot of unsatisfied customers or both.
If your customers were happier, they wouldn't be filing chargebacks and leaving negs and neutrals, so Paypal would have no REASON to hold back as much money.
ebay will be looking at the seller's rep when they make their decisions about whether to allow a refund on a claim. Your record may work against you.
You may be selling piles of stuff, but you're driving yourself crazy and I'm concerned that the trail of negs and neutrals is going to catch up with you.
I REALLY suggest that you look to that as an immediate concern and approach it with the attitude that it CAN be fixed.
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It is our similarities that make us all human - it is our differences that make us all interesting
Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere. Carl Sagan