Whether it is written in stone or not, with an international SNAD opened, the seller is supposed to provide the return shipping costs to the buyer up front and have the item returned prior to issuing a refund for the purchase price and original shipping. It is always expensive as has to be returned with tracking.
If the seller will not supply the return shipping costs up front, then Ebay can issue a full refund and tell the buyer to keep the item.
The only way that will not happen in some cases is if you can prove beyond any shadow of a doubt that it is a remorse return.
That can be very risky as buyers do not have to even give a reason for a SNAD.
If you try to fight it before the case is decided and Ebay steps in, it is almost 99.9999% that Ebay will find in the buyer's favor and you will get a severe strike on your selling account for an unresolved dispute.
Did your buyer return the item with tracking as that is required, has it been uploaded to the dispute??
It is totally the cost of selling on Ebay as it is their rules, written or not, that have to be followed.
I would not refund until the item is returned and make sure Ebay extends the case until the item is returned to you.
Personally as much as you dislike this, it is what will happen.
You can, once you feel you have a strong case is appeal after the fact.
Some may argue this and some may agree with this, so be it.
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