Respond to the seller. Not eBay.
Tell her that you bid on the basis of the total amount of asking price and shipping fee.
If you have paid that amount, ask her for the date of shipping, the service used and the tracking number.
This tells her you didn't just fall off the turnip truck. It's a very polite threat.
You can leave appropriate feedback. The most effective feedback is calm and factual. "Demanded more shipping money. Transaction cancelled." for example.
At the same time, you can leave Detailed Seller Ratings. A normal transaction gets 5 stars. The lowest rating is ONE STAR. (No stars is a free pass.)
For others in a similar situation.
If you had not paid, you would not have to pay a penny more than the advertised price.
Should she open an Unpaid Item Dispute, you could pay and she must ship within seven days or lose her Seller Protection.
If you were unwilling to pay and would prefer to cancel the transaction, you could ask her for a Mutual Cancellation. When it arrived, you would agree immediately.
This will release both of you from the transaction. And again you could leave appropriate feedback and DSRs.
