Ask him what a "text" is.
Play dumb.
Tell him you are wary of phoning long distance because it costs so much.
Ask him to phone you, and that he can get your phone number through Paypal when he sets up the invoice.
He is of course lying through his dentures. Invoicing and paying by mail is exactly what Paypal does.
May as well have fun with the crook.
Frankly I would not pay him at all. If he tries an Unpaid Item Dispute, he would have to send an invoice first. Which he does not seem to want to do.
