eBay

bodega128 · ‎11-06-2013

Hi all,

I'm an experienced pro seller, and buy and sell a lot on ebay. I rarely have issues with buyers or sellers, but when it happens, I do anything reasonable to avoid a neg (either received or given!). My last neg given was 7mths ago, to a US seller that refused to fulfill my order since it didn't sell high enough, and wasn't even apologizing.

Anyway, here's the story. Purchased an item from a CA seller with a 98.8% fb, description stated "NEW IN THE SEALED PLASTIC PACKAGE." with even pics posted of the seals. $25 shipping seems a bit high for a small $16 item shipped in the same country, but let's see what I get. Also, he had a huge block of "shipping rules" that basically stated it's forbidden to leave him neg feedback. Funny 🙂

Got the item. Postage was around $11 and item was received unsealed (both seals clearly broken). Contents seem new though. Alright, contacted the seller and asked him politely why the item is new open box while it was sold as new, and how he justifies $14 of handling (as a pro seller, if I ever happen to charge more than $2-3 over actual postage+packaging cost, I refund the buyer of that amount). Oh, he didn't like it! 🙂 His answer started by stating I was trying to blackmail him over getting positive fb (which I did not mention) and I was an idiot not understanding he unsealed the package to ensure the contents were in good shape. Well OK, some people have anger management issues... answered him politely that his answer was very rude and condescending and that were making a not-that-good buying experience to a bad buying experience and it was his role to change this (I would have accepted an apology for rudeness and either a very good reason for such high handling costs, or a partial refund if it was a mistake). Well, he answered angrily again 🙂 He basically stated that part of the item cost are in the shipping/handling and ebay didn't care if it was there or in the actual price (hum...wrong...that's a way to avoid paying ebay fees) and that he needed me to tell him what were my positive fb worth (yeah right, I'm the bad guy blackmailing you).

Gave him a week to give a proper, polite, answer, which didn't come. Well fine, I won't open a paypal case for that since it's not worth my time, just leave him a neg with approrioate DSRs (bad comm, item desc, shipping charges, and good shipping time), and move on. Well again, he didn't like that 🙂 He answered my fb and emailed me as well accusing me again of blackmailing him, and used an alternate account (same name and physical address) to purchase an item from my store. Alright, he wants to play... I answered his email telling him I understood his game and that was a risky one (using a 7000+ fbs account to get revenge over a neg given on a 1000+ fbs account) and it was his to correct his attitude, or deal with consequences. He answered that he had no idea what I was talking about, and again, that I was an idiot not following the rules (forbidden to leave him neg, ah ah) and how I wanted him to have the terms of this blackmailing situation be solved.

So, sorry for the super long message, but that siatuation was worth a full explanation. to understand it better. Of course, I used the "report buyer" button to alert ebay. What would you do next? Expect ebay to do the right thing (not sure if I can count on that)? Open a paypal case which would lead to further escalation? Approve him terms (yeah man, I'm an blackmailing ya, gimme da money)? Go dirty and use his methods and let the war begin (nah, can't do that)?

Thanks for your opinions in advance, and hope you enjoyed that story 🙂

dbcs.computer · ‎11-28-2013

Oops, looks like I used my main account. Oh well, at least you can see I was not lying. Anyway, ebay rep said she would email me the results in 24-48 hrs. I have a bad feeling about this...."it's clearly not the same buyer, we can't do anything". Well, 2 accounts are the same guy, the 2 other one are from the same town, within 6kms from each other, in a province where I very rarely sell, and all have Serb names (not very common!), both bought at the same time, both left neg and opened dispute stating the same lies a few hours apart.

I am now guessing the initial seller/buyer won't leave me a neg since it will be a lead to confirm these accounts are linked to each other.

Very frustrating...

i*m-still-here · ‎11-29-2013

When I was a brand new seller I had a problem with a buyer and being a newbie I got in over my head.

Today I'd be able to handle it no problem, but as a newbie ………. not so much.

The buyer was difficult and I felt threatened by NFB.

I called eBay and was told that I was free to buy her items using any id and shouldn't hesitate to do so.

The implication was clearly that I would be buying her item only to protect myself against NFB and they had no problem with that at all.

Perhaps things have changed, but I don't really think so.

I'd also like to point out that it's very common to be unable to see an opponents point of view in a situation such as this.

That by itself is not indicative or a symptom of any psychological disorder unless taken to the extreme such as narcissists tend to do.

I'd go through with the transaction and forget about leaving NFB…………… and I'd also stop using my selling id for buying.

Here is a good example why that's a very bad idea.

rose-dee · ‎11-29-2013

@i*m-still-here wrote:

I'd also like to point out that it's very common to be unable to see an opponents point of view in a situation such as this.
That by itself is not indicative or a symptom of any psychological disorder unless taken to the extreme such as narcissists tend to do.

What on earth?! Opponents? Psychological disorder? Narcissists?

Most of us consider we're running businesses, not fighting opponents. If you're referring to the buyer(s)' inability to see the OP's point of view, why should anyone be thinking about symptoms of psychological disorders in buyers? This is a truly off-the-wall way of interpreting the OP's situation with the buyer. It's a commercial problem to be sorted out so the seller can protect himself and move on, and it seems he's been trying to do that. I hope eBay follows through.

Frankly, I don't think there's much of a point of view to see in this instance. The OP evidently had a seller who got royally and inappropriately p...o...ed at being told the truth (through FB/DSRs) that he was a bad seller, and thought he'd found a way to get back at the OP. That's simply bad business on the original seller's part, and not the OP's fault.

i*m-still-here · ‎11-29-2013

@rose-dee wrote:
What on earth?! Opponents? Psychological disorder? Narcissists?

Most of us consider we're running businesses, not fighting opponents. If you're referring to the buyer(s)' inability to see the OP's point of view, why should anyone be thinking about symptoms of psychological disorders in buyers? This is a truly off-the-wall way of interpreting the OP's situation with the buyer. It's a commercial problem to be sorted out so the seller can protect himself and move on, and it seems he's been trying to do that. I hope eBay follows through.

Frankly, I don't think there's much of a point of view to see in this instance. The OP evidently had a seller who got royally and inappropriately p...o...ed at being told the truth (through FB/DSRs) that he was a bad seller, and thought he'd found a way to get back at the OP. That's simply bad business on the original seller's part, and not the OP's fault.

Hon, you need to go back and read the posts about spousal abuse and bipolar disorders.

i*m-still-here · ‎11-29-2013

Ooops that was posted before I was done …….. but for some reason those issues were presented by you and others and I have no idea why you were discussing them at all.

That's the point.

Stop treating the buyer like an opponent.

Rose, that's never a good idea!

i*m-still-here · ‎11-29-2013

@rose-dee wrote:
Well, I think Mr. E. has the right to talk about his own ex-wife's behaviour.

You've completely missed his point that arguing or attempting to reason with someone who displays such behaviour is futile. I too know this from personal experience, as I'm sure many people do. That knowledge doesn't lessen my compassion for their problems, but it doesn't mean I have to get entangled in their world of horrors either.

There are, unfortunately, some people who feed off such interaction, as Mr. E. says, and when you encounter them, as the OP did, it's usually best to remain calm, withdraw as quickly as possible, and move on.

Rose, you (above) were the one who was getting into labelling the buyer as someone with psychological problems.

I simply pointed out the fallacy in your approach.

I now fail to understand why the sudden about face?

rose-dee · ‎11-30-2013

@i*m-still-here wrote:
@rose-dee wrote:
Well, I think Mr. E. has the right to talk about his own ex-wife's behaviour.

You've completely missed his point that arguing or attempting to reason with someone who displays such behaviour is futile. I too know this from personal experience, as I'm sure many people do. That knowledge doesn't lessen my compassion for their problems, but it doesn't mean I have to get entangled in their world of horrors either.

There are, unfortunately, some people who feed off such interaction, as Mr. E. says, and when you encounter them, as the OP did, it's usually best to remain calm, withdraw as quickly as possible, and move on.
Rose, you (above) were the one who was getting into labelling the buyer as someone with psychological problems.

I simply pointed out the fallacy in your approach.

I now fail to understand why the sudden about face?

Recognition is far different from labelling. You have missed the entire meaning of my post. If you recognize that you're dealing with a particularly difficult person, don't engage with them as if it weren't a business transaction. Do whatever is logical and necessary to withdraw and end the interaction as smoothly and quickly as possible.

i*m-still-here · ‎11-30-2013

I did indeed miss the point of discussing bi-polar disorders and sociopaths in this thread.

It is simply not possible that one would be abler to "recognize" someone with one of these disorders as the result of a difficult transaction.

After all, that's all it was: A difficult transaction and nothing more.

bb_cool_stuff · ‎11-30-2013

...don't engage with them as if it weren't a business transaction.

True, these transactions are draining & sometimes unavoidable.

You did the right thing by contacting eBay.

Good luck, Keep you chin up & be assured that karma takes care of these types of buyers.

rose-dee · ‎11-30-2013

@i*m-still-here wrote:

It is simply not possible that one would be abler to "recognize" someone with one of these disorders as the result of a difficult transaction.

Please read my comment again. I didn't say I expected to recognize and make an amateur diagnosis of a psychological disorder.

However, I think anyone can recognize an especially difficult person (who may have an underlying psychiatric problem, or is just a walking nuisance with bad manners and an aggressive attitude, it really doesn't matter). It's fruitless and a waste of time engaging endlessly with such a person. Most of us know someone like that and have learned how futile such engagement is...which was Mr. E's original point.

bodega128 · ‎12-03-2013

Please stop arguing! 🙂

It was not just a difficult transaction, it was a difficult transaction followed by the seller trying to get back at the seller in multiple ways (seems he tried to get back at me with his alternate account, and when I told him I noticed it, he had some friends/family do the same in order to stay under the radar). That seems like some kind of disorder, to me.

Anyway, ebay rep told me it would be 1 to 2 days to make their decision. It's been 5 days already, and haven't heard back. I'll wait 2 more days to make it a week, then will call them back. How many sales did I miss because of these fake feedbacks?...

bodega128 · ‎12-13-2013

2 weeks have passed, and eBay have failed to provide with an update. Calling them was useless as well, since first person that answered admited he couldn't do anything, and transfered to a service that didn't answer the phone for 20min. Emailed Kalvin 2 days ago, putting all my hopes in his action now.

This evening, the obvious alias of my bad seller left a positive fb (by mistake?), "Excesive shipping for small piece of wire. Against ebay rules.". Considering I didn't charge him a cent more than Canada Post fees+$0.40 for the envelope...

Anyway, the message I am starting to get is: get your revenge by all the means you can, eBay doesn't care if you do, and won't do anything if you're targeted. Please prove me wrong...