Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

Yesterday & Thursday DH & I exhibited at at maple syrup festival which we do every year. Sales were mediocre but the show is cheap to get into and they have great entertainment. Many of the exhibitors have become very good friends over the years and we had a wonderful time visiting with them. Repeat customers stopped by to say hello and we had pleasant conversations with many new ones.

The day was very long but enjoyable. We left our home at 6:00 a.m. and arrived home at 10:40 p.m. after enjoying a relaxing dinner at a restaurant on the way home. Being a diligent eBayer I turned the computer on as soon as we got home and this is what I saw.

email 8:43 a.m.
I still do not have this item. Is there a tracking number ?

email 10:43 p.m. (same buyer with over 1000 FB)

This is my second attempt to get information on this order. What is the tracking number, and when did you mail this ??

Communication would be nice.


My blood began to boil but I immediately sent a reply stating that we were out of town all day on business. I also apologized for the delay in answering her question and told her that we did not have access to a computer that day.

Today I turned on the computer and was greeted with this email from another buyer who has purchased 3 item for which she has not yet paid.

HELLO:> I JUST REALIZED THAT I SHOULD HAVE ASKED YOU IF YOUR JEWELRY IS MADE FROM 925 STERLING SILVER?> AN IS IT NICKLE/LEAD ALLOY-FREE?> BECAUSE I AM HIGHLY ALLERGIC!!> IF IT'S NOT 925 S/S THENI WILL HAVE TO REQUEST CANCEL TRANSACTION AS ADVISED BY EBAY BECAUSE THIS WILL PREVENT HAVING TO RETURN JEWELRY AN FEEDBACK REPORT OTHER THAN A 5-STAR> PLEZ EMAIL ASAP> THANX KINDLY. PS:> THERE ARE 3 ITEMS ALTOGETHER.

Obviously another buyer who did not READ the description. Certainly there are worse scenarios on eBay than the above but it really makes me wonder why I bother to sell on eBay. My stress level just rose from 1 to 10. Time to do some really hard thinking to assess if it is really worth my time. At some of our shows we sell more in 2 or 3 days than we do in a month on eBay. And the cost much lower even with the gas & meals.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

I know what you are saying. It seems we are not entitled to sleep, eat or have a personal life. Late one Sunday night, I had supper with my husband in the kitchen.. I was away from the computer for 25-30 minutes. In that time I received 4 angry emails followed by negative feedback.

Someone recently advised me to start selling my stuff in person at similar sites (like you) With summer coming, I think I will try it.

My eBay selling started out accidently and it was fun. I swore I would never let it stress me out and banned everyone that did. It hasn't been fun for a long time now.
Just plain stress and 1/3 the sales with 3 times as many listings.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

You are right. It hasn't been fun for a long time. This is our 20th year of exhibiting at craft shows and events. The only stress we have doing them is the rush to set up in the a.m. after not getting up early enough.

We started out doing markets until someone told us to try the craft shows. It didn't take long to figure out that it was a much better venue for us. Sales were higher and we could pick and choose the shows we wanted to do and the weekends we wanted to do them. We also rented space in stores. All but one of those stores closed but we are still in business. Some of our shows have ended for various reasons and we haven't bothered trying new ones recently. It's time to take a second look at the applications that are always being sent to us.

I want more time to spend with my family. I am becoming a recluse thanks to eBay because it is so time consuming. This festival was the first show we have done since November. Being there, and enjoying being there...and then coming home to rude buyers....really brought home to me the fact that I have really begun to dislike eBay. We are treated like children by eBay. Buyers have learned that they can buy something, not pay and get away with it. They have learned how to manipulate sellers by FB threats...which is not considered extortion (huh!).

Who needs all the stress?
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

If ebay corrected the feedback to be more in favor of good sellers with demonstrated higher than average business practises, then it would be alot less stressful. How 'bout these?
- Maybe not allowing buyers with less than 10 feedback to leave negatives?
- Maybe keeping a negative on the sellers record for 30 days instead of a whole friggin' year?
- Maybe GETTING RID of the stupid shipping time DSR and NEVER allowing a negative to be able to be dished out because of poor Canada Post shipping times?
I don't know....I have lots of ideas, but will eBay listen to us? (the very people putting the $ in their pockets??).....highly unlikely.
We just had a tremendous weekend of website sales. No feedback worries, no dsr worries, no shipping time worries, and more $ in OUR pockets.
That's the way I wish that selling on eBay would feel....but until cows fly, I doubt that will ever happen.

Cheers,
AXE
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

You are right. It hasn't been fun for a long time.

I want more time to spend with my family. I am becoming a recluse thanks to eBay because it is so time consuming.

We are treated like children by eBay. Buyers have learned that they can buy something, not pay and get away with it. They have learned how to manipulate sellers by FB threats...which is not considered extortion (huh!).

Who needs all the stress?


This is really hitting home with me and I cannot agree more. What was once fun has become a ball and chain. We are putting in way more hours, paying way more fees and making way less money. Plus we have to put up with eBay's unfair selling policies which in my opinion have enabled the buyers to become lazy and not bother to read through the important details of the listings.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

- Maybe GETTING RID of the stupid shipping time DSR and NEVER allowing a negative to be able to be dished out because of poor Canada Post shipping times?

I think it needs to be there for the buyer's emotional satisfaction, but I don't think it should count. Most buyers don't seem to understand it at all.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

Amazingly, I had a buyer ask a couple of days ago if the rating system had any effect on sellers. I thanked him for asking and gave him a brief education on how sellers are affected. If all buyers understood DSR's they might leave better ratings. On the other hand they might be better left in the dark because there might be even more who would use it to manipulate sellers.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

Exactly. Feedback left is often influenced by how the person feels that moment. If he is miserable or frustrated, he/she will take it out on you. In this day and age with so much on our mind, how many purchasers actually remember details of a sale, such as when they bought or how much they paid for shipping. Few don't even read the description or the moment of "I want it" has passed and remorse has set in. Guilt at spending more than they could afford or buying something they did not need will spur negative feellings. Shipping cost should not even be rated. Its there on the listing and if its not satisfactory then they should not even buy. As for shipping time, we are at the mercy of the postal system. Many USA sellers refuse to ship outside of the USA because "they don't know how"..
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

Many USA sellers refuse to ship outside of the USA because "they don't know how"..


And I suspect there will be many more due to the new FVF's on shipping and the requirement to state exact International shipping charges upfront.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

Shouldn't be craftycat

As I understand it, the new FVF on shipping is based on the FIRST domestic shipping rate. And further on the cost of the first domestic rate to your own postal or zip code.

So if a California shipper were offering Parcel Post to US customers and Global Priority to Canadian customers, his FVF would be based on the Parcel Post rate to himself, even though the actual cost would be five times higher.

Conversely, if he offered Parcel Post at $5 to his US customers but LetterMail at $1 to his Canadian customers (not likely but let's pretend) his FVFs would be based on the lower of the two rates-- the $1 Canadian rate.

This is more likely to happen in Canada where it can easily cost $12 to ship a 3cm thick parcel from ON to AB, Regular Parcel, that would cost under $6 to ship anywhere in the USA Small Packet Surface. The Canadian sellers FVF for his US sale would be based on the $6 fee.

On the other hand, our American colleagues are known to panic when asked to ship to foreign destinations, like Canada, Hawaii, Germany....
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

I had a seller tell me today that she is going to add this to her listings and after-purchase-emails (or something to this effect) because of bad feedback and DSRs she's been getting for no good reason:

"Please remember that we want your purchase experience with us to be a positive one. If you find an issue with your order, please be patient and contact us first so that we can have the chance to make it right for you. Please note, that if you leave negative feedback and/or low seller ratings for us, returns or help with your order will not be honored. Give us the chance to ensure that you receive 100% satisfaction before leaving feedback and ratings- you'll be glad you did!"

Is this allowed does anyone know?

AXE
Message 11 of 19
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

eBay will refund the buyer and take your money regardless if the buyer files the right sort of complaint.
Message 12 of 19
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

Agreed, but would something like this not make some buyers "think" before leaving bad feedback/dsr's?
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

Maybe, but it might also trigger 1 stars on all counts. I found that when someone is in a vindictive mood, makes no difference what you did, do, or say. They will get you. This reminds me of one of my past customers. We became friends. Close friends on the internet, not in person. Seldom did a day go by that we did not write to each other. We told each other everything. She started selling the same line of jewelry I was selling. I didn't care (this was before Best Match). I helped her
every way I could. She was what you would calll "good competition" because she kept the prices up. She was so grateful, I was her best friend. We even bought from each other, but she was a bit slow with feedback, I always had to ask. Then I noticed that my DSR went down after she posted feedback. I asked her about it. She said she didn't give me any stars. Claimed she didn't know how feedback works and doesn't have time to bother. By then she was a Top Seller. I never spoke to her again.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

Sounds like she used you and then stabbed you in the back for your trouble. That kind of friend you don't need. But you reap what you sow so maybe it will come back to haunt her.

Please note, that if you leave negative feedback and/or low seller ratings for us, returns or help with your order will not be honored.

That has a negative ring to it and could be perceived as a threat to the buyer. They might just leave low ratings for spite.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

It is very negative and sounds like a threat to me. Statements like that generally make me look for another seller.

Plus, how many people actually read the listing and if they did, how many would still remember what it said once they received their item and were unhappy with it??
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

The buyer doesn't care what the seller's experience is like.

Nor need she care.

Please note, that if you leave negative feedback and/or low seller ratings for us, returns or help with your order will not be honored.

This sounds grumpy and negative and in my opinion would turn a buyer off, if she read it at all.

And don't we all want buyers who actually read the listing?

... we want your purchase experience with us to be a positive one. If you find an issue with your order, please be patient and contact us first so that we can ... make it right for you.

That speaks to the buyer's needs, I edited out the seller- oriented parts.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

This is the note I send via eBay to all buyers the first time they buy from me:

THX for your purchase and speedy payment! Your stamps will go out tomorrow ZZZZZZZdate. Because I stand behind what I sell, and I would like you to purchase from me again, if there are aspects of this transaction that you are unhappy with, please let me know so I can work with you to resolve it! Have a great day!

I also tape this note on a fluorescent piece of paper onto their receipt:
(again first time buyers only)

THX again for your purchase!

Because I stand behind what I sell, and I would like you to purchase from me again, if there are aspects of this transaction that you are unhappy with, please let me know so I can work with you to resolve it!

Have a great day!


Doing this has added more work, but it has helped.
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Getting fed up with buyers: FB threats & impatience.

Yeah I do agree with your posts. I also believe that line rings of negativity and only invites bad feedback. When I told this lady that, she disagreed with me and said that she was putting it in her listings as well as her final shipping email.
It was Bernie who taught me quite a while ago that emails to the buyer should be nothing but positive, and it has worked very well for me too. I actually do a similar thing as ricarmic stated above, but on a bit more of an elaborate level.
Thanks for your input, I cant wait to share your thoughts with this seller who thought I was "out in left field".

Cheers,
AXE
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