eBay

jt-libra · ‎01-10-2017

You know, I no longer worry about defects, late shipping, returns or disputes. Life is too short! I'm good at what I do -- I sell quality products, my communication skills are good, I package well, I ship quickly and, in short, I strive to make every transaction a positive experience for the buyer. But I can't do anything about the difficult or unreasonable buyer. Fortunately there aren't too many of them.

But nothing -- absolutely nothing -- enrages me more than when a buyer is rude. And I'm talking about young people because this has been my experience. The ones I have problems with have no reasoning capability, no patience, no understanding or respect. Who's raising these kids!

I made a mistake and I blame only myself. I listed a DVD for $45 CAD with free shipping and intended to make it available on .ca only. I mistakenly forgot to exclude the U.S. Anyway, it sold to a U.S. buyer which I had not intended and, even though it was a $45 item, I was not going to spend $16 to $18 to send a DVD by tracked packet. If it goes wrong, it goes wrong, I thought. It did, but was my own fault.

The buyer was a kid, 3 months new to eBay and a gamer based on his previous purchases. After 5 business days, I get a "hey what's goin on Wheres my DVD! It was futile, I know, but I sent a courteous message reminding him that I had sent a note when I shipped mentioning the reduced working hours by the Post Office during the holidays. together with a busy shipping season, and that delivery could take 2 or 3 additional days. I mentioned that the length of time he had waited really was not unreasonable, given these circumstances, and I asked for his patience in waiting for another 2 or 3 days. Nope! An INR was filed and a refund requested. I didn't even bother communicating or trying to resolve this. I just wanted rid of this kid so I sent the refund. Honestly, if I could have reached through the computer, I would have wrung his wretched entitled little neck. Because I will bet my bottom dollar that he already has it in his grubby little hands or will keep it once it arrives, laughing about how he pulled a fast one.

Thank you ..... I feel so much better 🙂

momcqueen · ‎01-10-2017

'Don't get me started on Millennials," said (me) the Generation Xer.

ricarmic · ‎01-10-2017

If it were me, and it is close enough still to when the refund was provided, I would still send a version of my form letter asking them to let me know if it arrives so I can send another invoice...... in the worst case it is a loss of 5 minutes time, in the best case it's $45 back again for 5 minutes time....one never knows.... they could be only impetuous and still have a conscience.....

momcqueen · ‎01-10-2017

You're right, it doesn't hurt to try.

ricarmic · ‎01-10-2017

A knobs a knob and one normally can't un-knob a person through email messages.

However one can't always tell if a person's really a knob by what they write.....I think we tend to see, believe, or actually "feel" the worst about the words that are written (look at how people sometimes misinterpret what folks write on these boards).

I've had my form letters work on the seemingly nastiest*, rudest* buyers, and not work on the most polite* buyers. (*by what they've written)

I've also talked on the phone with people who are totally different from what I expected by the "bad" stuff they wrote.

I'm lucky because normally I don't attach "feelings" to what I see written or what I hear. That causes other problems but makes it easier when dealing with these pain in the rear situations.....

jt-libra · ‎01-10-2017

@ricarmic wrote:
If it were me, and it is close enough still to when the refund was provided, I would still send a version of my form letter asking them to let me know if it arrives so I can send another invoice...... in the worst case it is a loss of 5 minutes time, in the best case it's $45 back again for 5 minutes time....one never knows.... they could be only impetuous and still have a conscience.....

I used to do this. Not that I've had a lot of lost items over the past 10 years, but I used to say to the buyer -- when the item arrives and if you no longer want it, please write Return on it and deposit it in a mailbox. If you still would like it, I will send you an invoice.

I never received any of the items back nor did I ever hear from the buyers again. Wait ... that's wrong. Twice the buyer messaged me to let me know the item had arrived (after I had refunded) but ignored the new invoice.

So I haven't had much luck in this regard and, with this particular individual, I wouldn't hold my breath.

I'm actually more upset with his rudeness and ignorance, than I am with the $45.

silverpinups · ‎01-10-2017

This is one of those situations when you have a troublesome buyer/situation where a Package needs to go with a Tracking Number. It's better to lose a little then to lose the entire transaction to a rude punk!

Always protect yourself, it may cost you a little but in the end you will be better off and less frustrated. Also give the buyer a free one way ticket to your blocked bidders list.

jt-libra · ‎01-10-2017

@jt-libra wrote:

I'm actually more upset with his rudeness and ignorance, than I am with the $45.

I really shouldn't have used the word "upset". What I am is "ticked off", not just with this individual but these types of individuals who you can't help but come in contact with on an almost daily basis. I never dreamt that good manners or courtesy would ever be considered "passé" but it's becoming so. Even when I've talked to friends of mine who have what I think are obnoxious kids, they justify it by saying that that's just the way kids are today and I should just get over it.

Anyway, this has now become off-topic but this last buyer I guess was the straw that broke this camel's back.

momcqueen · ‎01-10-2017

When I first started selling here, I had a Texan write me to (paraphrased) say, "Hey, where's my diecast, I paid four days ago and for what it cost me in postage, I should have had it already!"

It was totally abrupt and this was in the day before service tracked packet. So I expected the worst and kindly reminded him of the estimated delivery date and assured him it was promptly dispatched. (My handling time at that time was one business day.)

The buyer replied saying he didn't realize he'd bought from a seller in Canada. And that was was sorry, he'd wait.

I followed up with him about a week after the EDD and asked if he had received it. He had. I believe he left positive feedback but average DSRs for shipping cost and time.

But I still remember how rudely his initial contact had been made. It had been so very hostile.

momcqueen · ‎01-10-2017

My pet peeve is the reply, "No problem!" to me saying 'Thank you!" to a cashier or waitress.

Of course it's not a 'problem' to serve me. It's your job. The words you're looking for are, "You are welcome."

But I also distinctly recall my own dear grandmother wincing when I inadvertently said to her and Grampa, "How are you guys?" by way of greeting.

Every generation slips a notch in terms of etiquette.

Don't get me started with manners around smartphones and texting and acronyms. I have a teenage daughter, after all.

ricarmic · ‎01-10-2017

I think it bears mentioning that just like almost everyone else, I also would like so much to reach through the wires and yell at them, shake them or worse because aside from the $$$ loss, there is the time, the paperwork etc it creates/costs! I can't imagine anyone is able to la de da themselves through these things without being angry at some point.

My defense to saying and doing stupid things is to have my form letters. The form letters remind me to shift into "do what I can to minimize the loss of $$$, reputation and time". My experience is that being polite and professional increases the odds of achieving positive results.

It seems my results are better than yours, however they are no where as good as they really should be.

I am fortunate that I tend to operate in a mature adult environment that has been used to "mailorder" for over a century....

jt-libra · ‎01-10-2017

@silverpinups wrote:
This is one of those situations when you have a troublesome buyer/situation where a Package needs to go with a Tracking Number. It's better to lose a little then lose the entire transaction to a rude punk!

Always protect yourself, it may cost you a little but in the end you will be better off and less frustrated. Also give the buyer a free one way ticket to your blocked bidders list.

I know about protecting myself. I took a chance on this one and I lost. I had a lot of sales in December between my two accounts and it was really hectic around the time I shipped his item. So I didn't spend a lot of time thinking about possible negative repercussions -- I was almost in assembly mode at the time. I do recall briefly thinking .... should I or shouldn't I. Again, it's not about the money, it's about the "rude punk" as you so accurately put it.

ricarmic · ‎01-10-2017

@jt-libra wrote:
@jt-libra wrote:
I'm actually more upset with his rudeness and ignorance, than I am with the $45.

I really shouldn't have used the word "upset". What I am is "ticked off", not just with this individual but these types of individuals who you can't help but come in contact with on an almost daily basis. I never dreamt that good manners or courtesy would ever be considered "passé" but it's becoming so. Even when I've talked to friends of mine who have what I think are obnoxious kids, they justify it by saying that that's just the way kids are today and I should just get over it.

Anyway, this has now become off-topic but this last buyer I guess was the straw that broke this camel's back.

The good news for me is that by the time today's kids become stamp collectors I'll be dead anyway.....

femmefan1946 · ‎01-10-2017

"No problem" and "you guys" don't really bother me much, I believe it is just a change in language.

I'd rather be "guys" than "ladies" or "girls".

And I'm trying to get used to the third person sigular "they".

My dear friend Susan Wood used to say she took her doctorate so she had a better response to "Miss or Mrs.?" than "Reverend Mother".

Soon after, the honorific 'Ms." became common.

tobyshitzu · ‎01-10-2017

I've lost one item from the holiday season (so far?) that Im 99% sure received it. 0 fber, bought just before xmas, "not here must be lost" in an unrealistic/before the estimate time.

So im out a $20 sale+S&H (cost me 96 cents) and 5.70 in old stamps. Could have been prevented with tracking, but tracking on everything would have cost me $1000s. So I'd rather let the scammer have his item then guarantee myself a much larger loss

vintagenorth · ‎01-10-2017

Sometimes I'm really glad that I sell sewiing and craft patterns and fabric. I had a US buyer email me that the fabric she purchased in mid December had not arrrived. I asked her to wait a few more days and promised a refund if not delivered by Dec 11th. This morning this lovely lady emailed me to say she wanted to wait until next week in case the pkg was just held up due to the holidays. Of course I agreed, but what a nice surprise. When it does arrive for sure I am going to offer to refund the postage since it will be arriving late. I'm lucky, most of my buyers are a joy to deal with.